The Perfect Pair of Gloves

I was rooting around in my closet yesterday looking for my gloves, and I was reminded of a momentous discovery. Some designer with more R&D resources than I have should be paying attention. I’m about to make you.

I have two pairs of gloves. One is a pair of wool fingerless gloves, blue. The other pair is a pair of regular ol’ fingered gloves. (Huh-huh. Huh. He said the gloves were fingered.)

So a few years ago, I lost one of the one pair and one of the other, so I just started wearing them that way, with the fingerless glove on my right hand and the other on my left.

It may have taken me two weeks, but eventually I realized that this was the PERFECT PAIR OF GLOVES.

I mean, you wear fingerless gloves to afford you more dexterity while giving some, albeit compromised, protection from the cold. Gloves with fingers are better at insulating, of course, but just try to get your keys out of your pocket while you’re wearing them.

My unmatched set provides dexterity to the hand I’m more likely to need but total insulation for the other. I’m probably going to put one hand in pocket while walking down the street anyway.

Besides. You’ve got another pair just like them at home. (Well. Kinda.)

If I were a designer, I’d find a way to create this idea into a clothing line. Seems like the next best thing to me, save for my world-famous iPhone lanyard case (which I’m also amazed hasn’t caught on yet).


“Had Joe Lieberman not changed his vote at the last minute, we would have a public option in [the Affordable Care Act]. And if we had a public option in this bill, we’d probably still control the Senate.” (Howard Dean)

Dean is right. A public option at the very least would have made the ACA much more accessible and effective. It also would have been easier to sell and more difficult to obfuscate.

My favorite is when he refers to the ACA as “this Rube Goldberg thing.”

Watch.


And, by the way, directing federal agencies is well within the powers of the President; always has been. This is that whole “he shall take care that the laws be faithfully executed” thing. And yet, the Post reports that these numb-nuts have been talking lawsuit, or government shutdown. Unreal.


Blizzard to the Bones in Homes

Let It Snow

Meanwhile
I have just accidentally watched my first 3 1/2 minutes of Duck Dynasty on the television while heating up my noodles in a box in the break room. Apparently, a young man is going to take the young daughter to a dance. The family elders are torn about the idea because they don’t want the young man smooching their daughter, but they take him out huntin’ and it turns out he’s a pretty good shot, so he must be okay. Although, I would say that if you blow your prey to smithereens leaving only a tail, it doesn’t seem to me that you might be a good shot, but you’re not actually a good * hunter *, but what do I know? So anyway, the girl’s daddys continue to vacillate. I don’t really want to like the kid, they’re saying, I mean, I want to put a balloon between them when they dance, no wait, I want to put four balloons, but I do like the kid, though, I mean, he can shoot a gun and all, and

AAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGHHH! WHO IS WATCHING THIS INANE HORRIBLE CRAP?


Give me a bag. A brown paper bag. There’s things I want to put inside it, man.