When I was shopping for a college, my Dad tried to tell me how incredibly important it is to choose a school with a good basketball program.

Of course, at 18, I knew more than he did. Why the hell should I care if my school’s basketball team is any good? I’m not going to play basketball, I’m going to be a big braniac weisenheimer and pretend to be a student activist for a few years before going to work for the school newspaper. What he couldn’t convince my mushy, short-sighted little brain of was that, by the time I was 33 years old, college basketball would indeed be very important to me.

I love college basketball. I have witnessed what happens at a school that has a good basketball team when the team wins an important game. Every thoroughfare suddenly becomes Bourbon Street. Students start bonfires, girls waggle their boobs, people scream “tarnation” and pee in the streets…oh, gods, it’s wonderful. See everything I missed out on? Where I went to school, the only thing that got students into the streets was the illegal escalation of an undeclared war. (Actually, basketball was quite instrumental in the shootings. As it turns out, when you throw some 2,000 students out of a nice, comfy bar where they’re watching an NBA playoff game into an already tense situation in the street…guess what, LeRoy? You got riots!)

Anyway, so now, Kent is 13-1 in conference standings, which means they’re likely to take the MAC championship and go on to March Madness, which is approaching shortly…(Kent is 19-5 overall)…Kent is having a good season under new coach Stan Heath. They lost to Kentucky and Youngstown State, but by golly, they beat Ball State and Miami of Ohio (vital victories to win the MAC).

So, lookie there, Dad! I DID go to a good basketball school! Just a little too early, is all.