THE THIRD WORST thing that could happen by your forcing the Metro train doors open is that you might find yourself a Darwin Awards nominee, killing or injuring yourself via your own brutish stupidity.
The second worst thing that could happen is that you could achieve such a status not only for yourself but for the pack of idiots you are trying to help rush the Metro train doors. They are foolishly trusting your physical mettle as much as you do, and if you fail you’re not just responsible for hurting yourself; you are responsible for hurting them, too.
However, the worst thing that could happen is that you could make me and several hundred, perhaps several thousand, late to work. Foolish feats of strength such as the one I witnessed this morning are often why Metro trains end up stuck.
Please, mister: Don’t try to force the train doors open again.
Aaron B. Pryor